The theft, the broken window, the 6 year old boy

A few days ago, our family came home to discover Johnny's bike in the front yard. When we left that morning, Johnny's bike was behind the house. And so began the investigation that ended with a six year old culprit.

We walked to the side of our home, and found that the window, leading into the boys' bedroom, had been broken. There was a tool box lying on the ground, next to the broken window, and tools were scattered on the grass. The burglar bar was bent inwards, and the tools had clearly been used to crack the window and bend the bar. It was obvious, however, that no one had been able to enter our house, as the bars were not all the way bent, and the scattered tools indicated that the person trying to break in had been abruptly halted.

Joel walked around the house; in the back yard, hidden in some bushes, he discovered two six-year old boys, one of them, Chifundo, a playmate of our children. We were quite sure they could not have done this; after all, they were kids. They wouldn't have tools. The boys convinced us that they were just waiting for Frankie and Johnny, and went to play soccer in our front yard. Chifundo's friend ran off after a few minutes.

As we were discussing what to do, my language partner arrived. We explained our situation, and she called over to the Chifundo. In gentle Chichewa, she asked what had happened. She put her arm around him, spoke to him softly, and soon discovered the truth. He had stolen the tools from our neighbor's car, and then used them to break our window and bang on the burglar bar. He and his friend wanted to break into our house and steal Frankie and Johnny's toys.

We followed up on the story, going to our neighbor's house, where he discovered that his tools, indeed, had been stolen from his car. The neighbor also treated the child with great compassion, and by the time we reported the incident to the registrar, the little boy had been hugged, his hand held, and his head rubbed. During the entire afternoon, this child was treated with enormous compassion. It was a bit jarring, really. If at 6 years old, he could steal tools from a car, and then use them to break into another house, what would he do at 16? And while it was lovely to see him treated with such compassion, how was he to learn about the consequences of such behavior? These questions rattled in my mind.

Chifundo's parents died two years ago. He lives with a very kind family, his aunt and his uncle, who are both pastors, with 5 other children. They live very close to us, just down the road, and his uncle is currently studying in the United States for a year. Chifundo's aunt does not know what to do about his behavior; she is trying to complete a graduate degree, while pastoring a church, and raising 6 children without her husband present. As one can imagine, it is an overwhelming situation.

Compassion can be hard to figure out. How is one compassionate in this situation, when doing nothing can reinforce the terrible choices of this little boy? But, as Frankie said, "His life has been terrible." Certainly, this young child faced horrible loss, losing his parents at such a young age, struggling with poverty, wanting what he cannot have.

As I watched my Zambian sisters and brothers hug this child and hold his hand, I was confused, surprised, and moved. And frankly, I still am. But that evening, I sat with Chifundo's aunt, and listened to her concern, her worry, her hopes for the boy. And then together, we prayed for Chifundo, and I felt a love for him that overwhelmed me. He is bigger than any mistake he could make. We all are. Even if he had been a 16 year old, I hope I could have come to that conclusion, too. We are all bigger than our mistakes, all worthy of compassion, forgiveness, and grace. Whether the culprit is 6 or 16 or 46 or 66, he is a beloved child of God.

There are still gray areas: consequences, learning, change, growth. But one thing is not gray for me. I love this little boy who tried to break into our house. And I am grateful to my Zambian brothers and sisters for modeling this love in such a powerful way.